What makes a great parent?
A good parent is a person who strives to make decisions in the most effective interest of the child.
What can make a great parent is not only identified by the parent 's actions, but also the intention of theirs.
A great parent doesn't need to be perfect. Nobody is perfect. No child is perfect either … keeping this in your mind is important when we set the expectations of ours.
Successful parenting is not about achieving perfection. But it does not mean that we should not work to that goal. Set high standards for ourselves then and first our children next. We serve as important role models for them.
Top Ten Parenting Tips
You will be an even better parent, if you stick to these 10 tricks for parenting tips, and you will stay away from bad parenting.
They aren't all that simple or quick.
And probably nobody is capable of doing them constantly.
Even though some of these might not be 100 % successful, you'll be ready to move ahead using the suggestions in this parenting guide.
#1 BE A good Role MODEL
Walk the walk. Do not just tell your child what you wish them to do.
The most effective way to teach is showing them.
Human is an unique species in part because we can learn by imitation. We're programmed to imitate others' actions, understand them, and integrate them in to our personal. Children, in particular, watch everything their parents do very carefully.
So, be the person you want your child to be - respect your kid, demonstrate to them good attitude and behavior, have empathy towards your kid's emotion - and your child will follow suit.
#2: Love THEM And Show Through ACTION
Demonstrate the love of yours.
There's simply no such thing as loving your child too much. To love them can't spoil them.
Just what you decide to do (or give) in the name of love can - things as material indulgence, low expectation, leniency, and over protection. When these items are provided in place of real love, that's when you will have a spoiled kid.
Loving the child of yours may be as simple as giving them hugs, spending quality time with them, having family meals together, and also hearing your child's problems seriously.
Showing these acts of love can cause the release of feel good hormones like oxytocin. These neurochemicals can bring us a deep feeling of calm, emotional warmth, and contentment; from these, the kid, will acquire resilience and never to mention a closer relationship with you.
#3: Practice Kind And Firm POSITIVE PARENTING
Infants are born with around 100 billion brain cells (neurons) with relatively few connections. These connections create the thoughts of ours, drive our actions, shape our personalities, and essentially determine who we're. They are created, strengthened, and "sculpted" through life experiences.
Give the child of yours positive family interaction, especially in the beginning years. They'll then be able to experience positive experiences themselves and also offer them to others.
But if you give the child of yours negative experiences, they will not have the kind of development necessary for them to thrive.
Sing that silly song. Use a tickle marathon. Go on the park. Laugh with the child of yours. Give them good attention. Ride through an emotional tantrum with them. Solve an issue together with a positive mind-set.
These positive experiences create excellent neural connections in your child's brain and create the memories of you your child carries for life.
When it comes to discipline, it seems difficult to remain positive, especially when dealing with behavior issues. But it is possible by utilizing positive discipline and avoiding harsh discipline.
Being a great parent means you need to teach the child of yours the morals of what's right and what is wrong.
Setting limits and being constant is the golden rule to discipline that is good. Be kind and firm when you establish rules and enforce them. Concentrate on the reason for the child's misbehavior. And make it an opportunity for them to find out for the future in a positive way, instead of to get penalized for the past.
#4: Be a Safe HAVEN FOR YOUR CHILD
Let the child of yours realize that you'll always be there for them if it is responsive to your child's signals and vulnerable to their needs. Support and accept the child of yours as a person. Be a safe and warm place for your child to explore from and return to.
Kids raised by parents that are consistently responsive tend to have better psychological regulation development, interpersonal skills development, along with mental health outcomes.
#5: Talk with YOUR CHILD And Help THEIR BRAINS INTEGRATE
Most of us know already the value of communication. Talk to the child of yours and also listen to them carefully. By keeping an open line of communication, you'll have a much better connection with the child of yours as well as your kid will come to you when there's a problem.
But there's another reason behind communication. You help your kid integrate various parts of the brain of theirs, a crucial process in a kid's development.
Integration is akin to the body of ours, in which various organs should coordinate and work in concert to have a trully healthy body. When different parts of the brain are integrated, they are able to work harmoniously as an entire, meaning less tantrums, much more good behavior, much more empathy, and much better psychological well-being.
To accomplish that, conversation through troubling experiences. Ask the child of yours to explain what happened and the way they felt developing attuned communication.
You do not need to offer solutions. You do not have to have all of the answers to become an excellent parent. Simply paying attention to them talk. Ask clarifying questions using words that are simple are going to help them make sense of the experiences of theirs and integrate the memories of theirs.
#6: Reflect on Your own personal CHILDHOOD
A lot of us wish to parent differently from the parents of ours. Even people who had an excellent upbringing and a thankful childhood might want to change some elements of the way they had been brought up.
But very often, when we open our mouths, we speak just like our own parents did.
Reflecting on our own childhood is a step towards understanding the reason we parent how we do. Make note of things you would like changing and think of just how you would get it done differently in a genuine scenario. Attempt to be aware and change your behavior next time those issues come up.
Don't give up in case you do not succeed in the beginning. It takes practice, lots of practice to consciously change one 's child-rearing methods.
#7: Focus on Your own WELL-BEING
Parents require relief also.
Give consideration to your own well being to prevent parental burnout.
Oftentimes, things such as your own needs or maybe the overall health of your marriage are placed on the back burner when a kid is born. When you don't pay attention to them, they are going to become bigger issues down the road. Make time to strengthen the relationship of yours with the spouse of yours.
Stressed-out parents tend to be more prone to fighting. Don't hesitate to request parenting help. To have some "me time" for self-care and stress management is important to revitalize the mind.
How parents take care of their child mentally and physically can make a big difference in their parenting and family life. In case these two areas fail, your child will suffer, also.
#8: Do not SPANK, NO MATTER WHAT
No doubt, for some parents, spanking can result in short term compliance which sometimes is a much needed relief for the parents.
Nevertheless, this method doesn't teach the kid right from wrong. It only teaches the kid to fear external consequences. The child will be motivated to avoid getting caught with behavior that is inappropriate.
Spanking your child is modeling to the child that he/she can resolve issues by violence. A child who's spanked, smacked, or hit is much more prone to fighting with other children. They're more likely in order to become bullies and to use verbal/physical aggression to solve disputes.
Later on in life, they are additionally more likely to lead to delinquency and oppositional behavior, even worse parent child relationships, mental health problems, along https://parentinghowto.com/ with domestic violence victims or abusers.
There are an assortment of more effective alternatives to discipline that have been shown to be much more effective, such as positive discipline (Tip #3 above positive reinforcement and).
#9: Keep Things In Perspective And remember YOUR PARENTING GOAL
What's your goal in raising a child?
When you are like most parents, you want your child to excel in college, be prosperous, be responsible and independent, be respectful, enjoy positive relationships along with you and some, be to care and compassionate, plus have a happy, healthy and also fulfilling life.
But how much time do you spend working towards those goals?
If you're like the majority of parents, you probably spend most of the time just attempting getting through the day. As authors, Bryson and Siegel, point out in their book, The Whole Brain kid, rather than helping your kid thrive, spent most of time simply attempting to survive!
To not let the survival mode dominate your life, next time you feel angry or frustrated, step back. Think about what frustration and anger can do for you or the child of yours.
Instead, find ways to turn every negative experience into a learning opportunity for them. Even epic tantrums can be turned into priceless brain sculpting moments if you focus on teaching the child of yours, not attempting to control them.
#10: Take a SHORTCUT Through the use of Findings In Latest PSYCHOLOGY And NEUROSCIENCE RESEARCH
By shortcuts, I do not mean shortchanging your child with tricks. What I mean is to take advantage of what is currently known by scientists.
To parent is among the most researched fields in psychology. Lots of parenting techniques, traditions, or practices were scientifically researched, refined, verified, or refuted.
For optimum parenting advice for raising a child and info which are supported by science, here's among my personal favorite science based parenting guides, The Science of Parenting.
Using medical knowledge is of course not really a one-size-fits-all approach. Every kid is different. Even within the very best parenting style, there are able to be many different effective parenting methods you could choose according to your child's temperament.
A good example is employing spanking to discipline. There are many better alternatives, e.g. redirection, reasoning, time-in, etc. You are able to choose a non-punitive discipline method that works ideal for your child.
Naturally, you can also decide to use "traditional" or "old school" parenting styles (e.g. punishing or maybe spanking) and might nonetheless get a "similar" outcome.
Differential susceptibility has found us that children with different temperaments respond to the quality of parenting differently.
Those who are more vulnerable to parenting quality is going to have better outcomes under great parenting but worse outcomes under poor parenting.
Those people who are less prone may "turn out fine" no matter how strong their parents treat them. But it does not mean those practices are good. These children are simply fortunate. They can thrive despite poor parenting, not because of it.
Why take a possibility with sub-par parenting practices if you can use well-researched, better ones?
The value of parenting cannot be underestimated. Taking science based parental advice may not be the simplest way to parent. It may require much more work on your part in the temporary but can save you lots of agony and time in the long run.
Final Thoughts On Parenting
The good point is, that although parenting is hard, it's also very rewarding. The bad part will be the rewards usually come later than the effort. But if we try our best today, we will ultimately reap the rewards and have nothing to regret.
To Happy Parenting!